Restaurants: 97% of visitors to your website just want the address and phone no, not a Flash animation of a bloody artichoke.
I think it's adorable that hotels give you envelopes and letterhead. "Dear Jane. I'm sending you a letter...FROM A HOTEL. Don't write back."
Dyslexic epistemologists want to know why it's Causal Friday.
No disrespect to hip-hop culture.
But, do you REALLY want to remember your 20s as "that dark decade when I had to manually hold my pants?"
ICANN has .cheezburger ? #protolol
I wonder where they make all those little stickers that say "MADE IN CHINA".
"Tonight's forecast: Dark. Continued dark throughout most of the evening, with some widely scattered light towards morning." #CarlinQuotes
Today i fell in love with a lifeguard. Wearing red board shorts. On Santa Monica beach in LA. I am such a cliche.
No #London2012 tickets left for events taking place in the Olympic Park. Of course, it took me 22 pages of scrolling to discover this.
I like to end all my phone calls with "Ok, I'll see you later on at the party!" and then quickly hang up. Let them figure it out.
I walked into the room and there he was. Lionel. "Hello," he said, shaking my hand "Is it me you're looking for?" #interviewsbyhari
"I think we're alone now," Tiffany sighed at me as we stood on the desert island, "there doesn't seem to be anyone around" #interviewsbyhari
Something outside scared Freddie. Nervously glancing out of the window, he shrieked "I see a little silhouette of a man" #interviewswithhari
"You may say I'm a dreamer," said John Lennon, looking up at me fm his white piano. "But I'm not the only one." #interviewsbyhari
If you work at Nintendo, I think a creative way to ask for a raise is to jump on your boss's head three consecutive times.
Bloody raining! I could have got a cool gig colonising the bahama's - but no, Africa. #Companypolotics
@feliciaday I do not know why you was autcorrected to upu. Or what an upu is.
BUS GAME: Strip naked behind a seat. As people get on, jump out, say you're from the future and that they need to get off the bus RIGHT NOW!
Last minute panic! We couldn't find Wills' passport anywhere! Luckily his Gran gave us a note telling Canada to let him in! #royaltour
Sunspots, Chuck Norris, aliens & agents with tendencies. We’re investigating all of them. Rough day which shouldn’t have happened.Apologies
I'm old enough to remember when David Pogue would read the WHOLE press release before misunderstanding it.
*Ok, technically that happened on 14 June but no one noticed until he started up his ox wagon.
June 2011, Part 1, May 2011, Part 2, May 2011, Part 1